This week I weighed in at 204. Down two pounds. My mind feels brighter and I am finding I have more energy. I started back to teaching, after our year end break, which brings about a new selection of challenges. Mondays, I eat snacks in the car, driving between classes. Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays I typically eat out, using the down time to read and write. As we all know eating well in a restaurant can be a challenge, between calories, portion sizes and other temptations. This is where Sinking Energy can come into play.
Sinking Energy, on a physical level, is about letting go of unnecessary muscles. Allowing my structural alignment (bones) to bear the majority of the load and my muscles to move the load from place to place, in proper alignment. On a mental level, Sinking Energy becomes about letting go of thoughts which do not serve me. "its just one treat", "I deserve this" and "I don't care" are three big ones for me, especially when I am looking at things that do not support my long term health goals.
Taking a step back, before I could make a conscious choice to move past these "self talk" messages, I first had to hear them clearly, acknowledge that they at one point may have served me but are now in my way. Here is a typical example form my week - I am feeling "snackie" and head to the pantry. Nutella! I can smell it, remember how it tastes and want some. Then I hear, "but you shouldn't". Then, but I have been so good, I swam 2000 meters on Thursday - "I deserve this". If I am able to resist further, then I hear, "I don't care". Even though a part of me knows I really do care. Especially when my pants are too tight and I feel foggy and tired after the fact.
In my work with addictions, I have learned that the typical "physical need" once triggered, lasts only about 20 minutes. After that it is a mental game. So one strategy I am implementing on this journey is to sit with the craving and self talk for 20 minutes before I make a final decision on the "treat". This does not mean sitting in meditation, although that can be very good if the craving is strong. It simply means to spend time listening to the craving. I find that doing something else while I am actively listening to the craving helps distract. With this practice, I am finding that after about 15 minutes, the internal drive for the treat is basically gone. And if, after waiting, I choose to have the treat then I eat it slowly, allowing myself to enjoy every morsel, guilt free. That is the deal. Obviously if the addiction is deadly, such as with narcotics, leaving the guilt free sampling out is critical to long term success.
I found a saying that I have posted on my wall next to my desk which is helping me with letting go of these thoughts that no longer serve my best interests.
"Discipline is choosing between what you want NOW, and what you want MOST." Perfect.
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